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Liam Payne's Sketchy New Girlfriend

Aug 20, 2013 -- 5:21pm

If you’re a Directioner, I’ve got some sad news for you. Okay, the secret’s out, because I put it in the title… but yeah, Liam Payne’s got a new girlfriend, this lovely young lady right here by the name of Sophia Smith:

Evidently Liam has known this girl for years (they went to St. Peter’s Collegiate school together, which is a high school, despite what it sounds like), and one of the reasons he likes her so much is because she knew him before he was famous … but then there are rumors that she had turned him down 22 (TWENTY TWO!) times in the past… all before the advent of One Direction

It seems like Liam’s had a thing for this girl for quite some time, but let’s do some quick math here folks… If x = pre-fame rejections and y = One Direction stardom, then 22x + y = gold digger. Why else would she suddenly change her tune? In the immortal words of Silent Bob, “there’s a million fine looking women in the world dude, but they don’t all bring you lasagna at work. Most of em just cheat on you.” Take that to heart, Liam.

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